Can We Not Wreck The Internet, FCC?

It’s easy when you’ve got all the information.
Inside help, no investigation.
No questions in the House, no give and take.
There’s a big bang in the City.
We’re all on the take…
“Shopping”, Pet Shop Boys

Today, July 12th, 2017, is notable for being few things:

  1. A Wednesday, which means you’re gonna need a nice big cup of coffee;
  2. One of the few days without any major sporting events in America (only Wimbledon); and
  3. A day of action to support the idea of Net Neutrality.

So, I know what you’re all thinking… what is ESPN going to talk about apart from Wimbledon? Don’t worry – they’re probably talking about Lavar Ball and how he’s trying to perfect the foot sandwich. Maybe Carmelo Anthony will get traded by dinner time tonight. Oh, there’s also the Mayweather/McGregor fight.

Oh, and also, about that net neutrality thing. Continue reading


They Gave 110% – Homer Simpson Enters Cooperstown


Well, Mr. Burns had done it.
The Power Plant had won it
With Roger Clemens clucking all the while.
Mike Scioscia’s tragic illness made a smile.
As Wade Boggs lay unconscious on the ballroom tile…

I just want to give a quick bit of congratulations to The Simpsons for getting Homer Simpson into the Baseball Hall of Fame – primarily for their brilliant “Homer at the Bat”.

Probably the most memorable episode of The Simpsons third season (if not my personal favorite), “Homer at the Bat” really did strike gold as to the appeal enclosed. It was silly, both in the sheer amount of baseball legends it featured playing for the Power Plant and the situations they faced themselves in keeping them away from the championship. However, beneath that was the idea of a small softball club getting taken over by baseball supremos, and our hapless and quirky protagonist getting shafted to the side, absolutely crushing him. It also played with sports cliches – Homer doesn’t go back in because his replacement was unavailable or out of sympathy, but out of strategy. There was no “save the orphanage” trope – it was all just to add another $1M to the pile.

It also played with sports cliches – Homer doesn’t go back in because his replacement was unavailable or out of sympathy, but out of strategy. There was no “save the orphanage” trope – it was all just to add another $1M to the pile of a multimillionaire’s vault of money. The reasons why the legends wound up taken out show the idiocy, selfishness, and bouts of just plain insanity in Springfield. (“Pitt. The. ELDER!” “Lord Palmerston!”) And the win? It was not heroic and dramatic at all. It expands not just the universe on a large-scale level, but a more local level, also.

Oh, there’s also the small matter of the episode being the first to outdraw The Cosby Show in the ratings. Yup, this was the episode that proved that The Simpsons were the show to watch, and that for good or for ill, that they were here to stay.

Other episodes were cited as well – the rather emotional yet still brilliant “Dancing Homer”, focusing on Homer’s brief stint as a baseball mascot, and the quirky “Hungry Hungry Homer”, which had him take up a protest to keep up his hometown team. It’s been a while since I saw the latter, admittedly, but I will attest to the former also being a damn fine reason for induction – a brilliant analysis on the league system of Baseball through the eyes of a mascot. (“That stuff may play in the sticks, but this is Capital City!)

Still, there’s a reason “Homer at the Bat” has gotten so much praise from the baseball community. It’s hilarious, quotable, and yet still felt like the writers gave their all in it – doing their research and writing such vibrant comedy without sacrificing the show’s traces of heart. It deserves to be a reason for putting Homer Jay Simpson amongst the greats of America’s pastime – as both a parody and a loving tribute. The national pastime truly becomes one with probably the most influential TV show in American history… how poignant.

We’re talkin’ softball, from Maine to San Diego.
Talkin’ softball, Mattingly and Canseco
Ken Griffey’s grotesquely swollen jaw.
Steve Sax, and his run-in with the law.
We’re talking Homer, Ozzie and the Straw…

Sadie Miller and the Tenth Doctor To Star in Ducktales Reboot

“Philistines! I mean, how can you remake Casablanca? The one staring Myra Binglebat and Peter Beardsley was definitive!” – David Lister (Red Dwarf, “Better Than Life”) expressing many people’s initial reaction to remakes. Thankfully, he might just be rebutted.

Today, DisneyXD (AKA, that network that made the lives of Gravity Falls fans utter torture) debut a trailer for their reboot of the 80s cartoon DuckTales. It introduced the cast by having them sing the (incredibly) memorable theme song.

Of note is Kate Micucci, the voice of Steven Universe‘s Sadie, getting the role of Webby, a friend of the triplets. (I am going to roll over laughing if Kate Flannery, Matthew Moy, and/or Zach Callison get a guest role. Reddit and Tumblr will have a field day.)

But, even more notable (especially to people that don’t watch Steven Universe, or are British and/or Anglophiles) is the choice for Scrooge McDuck.

Continue reading

"Like The Cleaning of a House…" – The Simpsons Renewed Through Season 30 never ends.
Taken from

FOX has given The Simpsons yet another stay of execution – keeping it on the air until Season 30.

The big news out of this is that The Simpsons will beat Gunsmoke in terms of it’s how many episodes it has aired. This makes it, simply put, the longest running primetime scripted show in American history.

My thoughts on the show’s quality have been relatively clear, but just in case you need a refresher, it’s time to bring the curtain down on America’s Favorite Family. The reasons have been listed time and again by fans across the internet, and I agree with at least 90% of them. In fact, animation critic PieGuyRulz actually created a video that sums up the central problem with the show – it’s story engine and time within that have effectively damned it to mediocrity.

Thankfully, I have a hunch that this could be the last time the show gets renewed. Continue reading

Gravity Falls, Dipcifica, and You!

Hey, welcome to the new site. Same as the old site, just at a new URL.

What better way to make a first “real” post for the new URL then speculating on the “Northwest Mystery Noir”, the next episode of Gravity Falls? Or, as I like to call it, “ShipCON 2”, given that the fandom is freaking out over who is going to make out with whom.

Yes, Dipper and Pacifica will wind up in a mystery together in Pacifica’s mansion. Alone. Without anybody else. Apparently, they have to go take on a ghost or something of the sort. Gee, what uncharted territory.

Fans right now are waiting, hearts skipping beats as the American airdate (February 16th) comes closer, so they can flip out if and/or when Pacifica smooches Dipper.

Given the buildup this episode has (coming off of a nearly three-month hiatus not helping), I figured I’d discuss what might be the most discussed aspect of this episode so far- the possibility of Dipcifica, or Pacifidip, or the Lilac Tree, or whatever the hell the fandom is calling this ship.

Ladies, Gentlemen, representatives from the fine press establishments and the New York Post

Surprised? Continue reading