Scullyfied Simpsons: “The Blunder Years” (Season 13, Episode 5)

Homer: “There have been so many classic Simpson moments. I remember that time I tried to jump over Springfield Gorge…”
(flashback to “Saturdays of Thunder”)
Homer in Flashback: “I’m gonna make it!”
Lisa: “No, dad! Everyone’s sick of that memory!”
– Lies, damn you!

Airdate: December 9th, 2001

Written By: Ian Maxtone-Graham

Plot: While going out to dinner with the family to make up for an unfortunate paper towel mascot incident, Homer finds himself in the clutches of a local magician. His tricks manage to dredge up a haunting memory from his past that results in him screaming through the night. One tea ceremony later, he reveals that at the tender age of 12, he discovered a dead body blocking an inlet pipe heading out to the local quarry. But who was he? And how did he wind up in the inlet pipe?

Review:

We have reached endgame.

While I have two other episodes and a movie to go, this is really the last dance of Mike Scully’s tenure – the last episode to be aired before Al Jean took the helm indefinitely. One other episode that was produced later was aired weeks earlier. He would helm another episode at the start of Season 14. But this, my friends, is effectively the end of the most controversial era in Simpsons history.

Kind of moving, in a way. Even with a lot of the clunkers that I’ve reviewed, you can’t deny that the end of any era is going to be rather poignant. Reminds me of the last few seasons of Eli Manning’s tenure at the New York Giants – his play got rustier, the team didn’t play up to par, and yet when he was benched for Daniel Jones, I was still rather moved. He played a few more games before hanging it up, but it was still a changing of the guard. Still my QB, forever and ever.

But enough about sportsball, we’ve got The Simpsons to take care of. And this time, we’re flashing back to the late 60s/early 70s! Let’s get some mood music going, and dive into “The Blunder Years”.

Scullyfied Simpsons: “A Hunka Hunka Burns in Love” (Season 13, Episode 4)

No context needed.

Chinese Restaurant Waiter 1: “Hey, we’re out of those “New Love” cookies!”
Chinese Restaurant Waiter 2: “Well, open up the “stick with your wife” barrel!”
– “The Last Temptation of Homer”

Airdate: December 2nd, 2001

Written By: John Swartzwelder

Plot: Homer’s complaints about the cliched nature of fortune cookies drives him to write his own take on the words of wisdom, this time as predictions. One such recipient is Mr. Burns, who discovers that he will find true love on Flag Day. And he does – seconds before midnight, he falls head over heels with Gloria (Julia Louis-Dreyfus). The two go out, and Burns convinces Homer to be his wingman.

Review:

Mr. Burns falls in love with the apparent woman of his dreams because a fortune cookie told him that he would.

Where’s my Yuengling? Because just the concept alone is cause for immediate and grave concern. Charles Montgomery Burns. Falling in love. To follow the whims of a fortune cookie. One that was written by Homer Simpson.

On one hand, there have been many plots before and after that looked horrible on paper, but were executed in a way that made them competent, if not downright impressive. And this show has demonstrated a more human, albeit still menacing and callous, aura to Mr. Burns before. On the other hand, this show’s recent track record is not good with, well, anything. They’ve already messed around with Mr. Burns, either declawing him (“Monty Can’t Buy Me Love” and “The Mansion Family”) or turning him into a cartoonish manchild villain (“Homer vs. Dignity”, oh gods). So my hopes were admittedly low.

But maybe, just maybe, I would be surprised. Could Scully and company pull out a minor miracle?

Nope! This episode is quite poor, and it’s NOT any relief that there are worse episodes out there. Just.

Scullyfied Simpsons: “Day of the Jackanapes” (Season 12, Episode 13)

“This is your Waterloo. Soon, you’ll be Napoleon Blown-Apart.” – Sideshow Bob.

Airdate: February 18th, 2001.

Written By: Al Jean

Plot: Livid at the ceaseless manipulation by network executives, Krusty the Clown throws his hands up and announces his retirement. Upon hearing this news and hearing Krusty throw shade at Sideshow Bob, the imprisoned one plots ultimate revenge. And his path to finally finishing Krusty off in style could also mark the end of Bart Simpson, as well.

Review:

The nature of The Simpsons is one of a few ways in which the show betrays its age somewhat. It’s a rather episodic series – you can throw on any episode (in the golden era, mind you), and for the most part, you won’t be too lost as to where the characters stand and what they are doing in their lives. It’s a bit of a rarer breed nowadays, as the ubiquitous nature of streaming services has furthered the shift in comedies to more serialized formats (for binging purposes).

There are elements of continuity, however, and there have been a few series arcs within The Simpsons. Probably the most notable of these has to be Sideshow Bob’s role as the show’s recurring antagonist. His episodes from Seasons 1 through 8 are regarded as among the show’s most beloved. “Krusty Gets Busted” is, to my eyes, an early sign of the show’s brilliance. “Cape Feare” is almost universally regarded as one of the best episodes of animated comedy ever. And “Brother from Another Series” served as a fantastic capper to the show’s notable “guest” antagonist.

But the show kept going, and now, four years after his last major appearance, Sideshow Bob is back for yet another outing. Even with the show sinking lower and lower, could this outing provide some sort of reprieve from the decay?

Scullyfied Simpsons: “Skinner’s Sense of Snow” (Season 12, Episode 8)

Ah, a nice visual metaphor for watching Season 12 so far.

“The weather service has upgraded Springfield’s blizzard from a winter wonderland to a class-three killstorm.” – Kent Brockman.

Airdate: December 17th, 2000.

Written By: Tim Long.

Plot: A sudden storm rapidly moves over Springfield, causing chaos and madness. Thankfully, most of the schools in the area are closed. The one exception? Springfield Elementary School. This is not a particularly wise move – by the end of the day, the school is effectively snowed in. Skinner’s attempts to maintain order by going back to his Vietnam experiences creates further resentment among the students. When Skinner finds himself trapped in a snow tunnel that Bart constructed to try and escape the building, all hell breaks loose.

Review:

There’s an old saying that gets passed around from time to time. It goes along the lines of, at some point, things get so bad and you fall so deep and so far that you have nowhere to go but up.

Well, The Simpsons saw fit to challenge that argument this season. Of the past six episodes, I can think of a grand total of one I want to revisit in the future. And even that was more “good, not great” than anything. To add insult to injury, the past three episodes are in the running for the Scully Era’s “worst episodes” list. It’s basically a repeat of the “Mansion Family/Saddlesore/Alone Again” streak from the last season, except that streak at least waited until the middle of the season to tarnish the franchise for good.

If I had hope for Season 12, it is all but gone. All I can beg for is that it winds up mildly better than Season 11. It’s a low bar to clear, but trust me, this show knows how to trip over low bars now. From brilliance to baffling, how astonishing.

So I actually was looking forward to “Skinner’s Sense of Snow”. I mean, I don’t recall it as a particular favorite, but it wasn’t like it was one of the more infamous episodes. Maybe, just maybe, it would provide some stability to the season, possibly add some hope for the rest of the episodes.

However, I was actually quite surprised at what I encountered. “Skinner’s Sense of Snow” is actually quite… bad. Yeah, I was not expecting to dislike this one as much as I did, but dislike I did! If I do a “Top 12 Worst of Season 12” list at the end of Season 12 (which I likely will), it would be hard to see this episode not contending for a spot.

Scullyfied Simpsons: “Insane Clown Poppy” (Season 12, Episode 3)

“For a clown, you’re not really a lot of fun.” – Sophie. Pretty interesting analysis of one of The Simpsons most iconic side characters.

Airdate: November 12, 2000

Written By: Don Payne and John Frink

Plot: While signing books at a town book fair, Krusty the Clown meets a girl claiming to be his daughter. Given that she has green, curly, pointy hair, and triggers a flashback to Krusty’s liaison with a soldier during the Gulf War, she might have a point. His attempts to bond with the daughter are awkward, but the two do share a small bond over music. However, Krusty gambles the violin away dur

Review:

Let’s not beat around the bush here – “Insane Clown Poppy” is less awful than it’s predecessor. Unfortunately, “less awful” can mean anything, and in this case, it does not work in the episode’s favor. More specifically, this episode is uninteresting, and much of what is of note here is rather boring.

But first, let’s flashback to what made this series so iconic way back when.

The world of The Simpsons was constructed as a microcosm of America around the end of the Cold War – the late 80s to early 90s. Pretty much everything that defined the nation around this time found its way into the show, be it representative of a piece of pop culture or an idea within our society. The Springfield Nuclear Power Plant was representative of corrupt business culture, the Elementary school a symbol of decaying educational systems, et cetera. Even individuals served as representatives of American culture – for example, the Quimby family was a swipe at the Democratic political dynasties, as well as corruption and nepotism in politics overall; Lovejoy a religious figure who had seemingly lost the spirit of his faith; et cetera.

Krusty the Clown is probably the oddest aspect of this symbolism. He was based on a style of entertainment that had already been on the wane by the late 80s – local children’s programming – and is virtually extinct nowadays. However, he was symbolic of the two faces of celebrity; he demonstrated the family-friendly public face, and the sleazy, money-chasing private facade. He got his own fast-food chain that sells slop to the townsfolk, will merchandise any sort of poorly-made product, blows through money like it’s no tomorrow (“I thought the Generals were due!”), dodges his taxes on an industrial scale, smokes like a chimney, drinks like a fish, is willing to sell intellectualism down the river (hence why Bob snapped), and has slept with countless one-night stands, resulting in many illegitimate children.

So, what if we were to take a look at one of those aspects individually? It’s been done before – “Bart the Fink” exposed his corruption (which was so brazen, it took five minutes from the start of the investigation to send him down). “Homie The Clown” looked at his horrid money habits. “Bart Gets Famous” looked at how he played into the fleeting nature of celebrity. And now, this – an expose into one of his illegitimate children entering his life, and this time, not as a made-for-tv movie.

Scullyfied Simpsons: “Days of Wine and D’oh-ses” (Season 11, Episode 18)

In context, it’s a good metaphor for the episode. Out of context, it’s a sublime metaphor for the series!

“There’s a line in `Othello’ about a drinker:`Now a sensible man, by and by a fool, and presently a beast.’ That pretty well covers it.”  – Barney Gumble, Puke-a-hontas, “A Star is Burns”. Weirdly apropos given the episode covered today.

Airdate: April 9th, 2000.

Written By: Dan Castellaneta and Deb Lacusta

Plot: Barney Gumble is disturbed when he sees a video of his birthday party. There, he was so drunk as to become the largest fool in the town. Combined with the constant mockery from his fellow barflies, he decides to quit drinking for good. But the temptation still remains, especially when the less-than-teetotal Homer tags along on his path to sobriety.

Review:

Season 11 of The Simpsons really does feel like a show clinging to life, to relevancy, to any sort of cohesion that is ebbing away.

I mean, the remanents show does so nowadays by the proliferation of guest stars, as well as attempts to be relevant that often indicate that a trend or meme is deader than dead. But in terms of narrative, Season 11 of The Simpsons seems to be indicative of a show realizing that the story engine has mined the well dry. However, it was also too successful to end – whether it was the writers, the voice actors, or the network executives, they were too proud or too greedy to let the show come to a natural end.

As a result, what we have so far this season (besides the increase in gimmicks and the show’s world collapsing into a black hole of inane insanity) are the gambles made on three characters – Apu Nahassapeemapetilon, Ned Flanders, and Barney Gamble. The nature of their circumstances were all radically reformed, albeit in different ways. Apu and Manjula decided to start a family, got his wish in the most extreme way, and now has to deal with eight children – making the stressed-out father the central component of his character (whatever is left, anyway). Ned Flanders, long the happy-go-lucky yin to Homer’s yang, had his wife die… in an accident caused, exacerbated, and downplayed by Homer… and I’m going to stop there because my blood is boiling already.

Barney’s change is the most unique. It’s not something that actually comes out of nowhere, but actually has its roots in the show’s broader narrative. Of course, I feel like the aforementioned changes might have been executed well (or at least, had some small level of merit) in another universe. So the question is, how do the writers do on this particular gamble?

Scullyfied Simpsons: “Take My Wife, Sleaze” (Season 11, Episode 8)

No, I did not find this on DeviantArt. (ORIGINAL CHARACTER DO NOT STEAL!)

“When you get a job interview, try not to call your employer a punk, or a skank.”  – Marge Simpson. Give this episode credit – we could take her advice here.

Airdate: November 28th, 1999

Written By: John Swartzwelder

Plot: A trip to a 50s kitsch diner lands Homer a motorcycle in a dance competition. Having learned to ride it, he decides to start up his motorcycle gang. They mainly serve to commit petty annoyances around town. But trouble starts when a biker gang with the same name as Homer’s gang comes into town, livid.

Review:

Season 11 of The Simpsons is a season that, quite frankly, doesn’t know what the hell it’s really doing so far.

On one hand, you have episodes such as “Eight Misbehavin”, “Days of Wine and Do’hses”, and “Alone Again, Natura-Diddily”. These episodes attempted to dramatically shift the status quo of one of the most iconic television franchises in all of history. However, most of these changes didn’t concern the immediate Simpson family. Which is fine, except that these episodes would ultimately mix in the Simpson family, by which I mean, Jerkass Homer would be welcomed into their lives despite oftentimes screwing things up royally. Besides that, these episodes couldn’t resist a lot of trappings of their contemporaries – attempts at seriousness and occasional social commentary were damaged by the inane plot twists, increasingly unsympathetic characterization of our protagonist, and the show losing grip of reality.

Then, of course, there are episodes that don’t really pretend to be about anything and tend to revolve more around stuff happening. They’re both equally bad – the “serious” episodes often befuddle (if not outright offend) me because of how poorly they measure up to their predecessors in Seasons 1-8, while the latter… well, they have no freaking structure at all.

Hence, “Take My Wife, Sleaze”, or as I like to call it, “We made Homer an artist and a director already, let’s make him a biker.”

Scullyfied Simpsons: “E-I-E-I-D’oh!” (Season 11, Episode 5)

“That’s pretty clever, Dad. I mean, for a product that’s evil and deadly!” – Lisa, trying her hand at marketing criticism. Hey, she was a food critic, sort of.

Airdate: November 7th, 1999
Written By: Ian Maxtone-Graham
Plot: Homer’s newfound penchant for declaring duels to get what he wants ends badly, when a Southern Gentleman takes up on his offer. Facing a duel by pistol, he and the family skip town and become farmers. Initially unsuccessful, they wind up tapping into an untapped market, thanks to some tobacco seeds, some tomato seeds, and radiation.

Review:

Over the past few seasons, The Simpsons has slowly embraced weirder, more outlandish elements in their plots. While there was always a cartoonish aura to the show, most of these elements in the first eight seasons were there for a quick joke, particularly in the David Mirkin era. Suddenly, with the Mike Scully Era taking hold, entire plots began shifting in the third act to a more cartoonish climax – ironically, as the animation became more stolid, and as the rest of the writing skills (characterization, plot development) began flatlining.

Season 11, in particular, is infamous for these more zany twists. Examples given include a swordfight between Homer and a motorcycle gang, Maggie gaining superhuman strength in a time of crisis, self-dancing tap shoes, and everybody’s favorite, the society of evil jockeys.

“E-I-E-I-D’oh!”, in particular, has a rather interesting “third-act twist” – one where Homer, during his new job (again) farming, becomes a tobacco baron. Thanks to tomatoes. And plutonium.

No, this wasn’t written on cannabis, as far as I am aware.

Scullyfied Simpsons: “Beyond Blunderdome” (Season 11, Episode 1)

Our hero – proclaiming his wife as property because Mel Gibson is at the front door. Were these writers trying to make him unlikable?

“Movie tickets? That’s hardly worth destroying a car!” – Homer Simpson. To be fair, that is a fine piece of logic, that I’m sure will carry through the season.

Airdate: September 26th, 1999

Written By: Mike Scully

Plot: An electric car manufacturer entices potential buyers to test drive with possible gifts. Homer’s reward for test-driving (read, destroying) the car is two tickets to a test screening of Mel Gibson’s newest movie, Mr. Smith Goes To Washington. While Marge (who is infatuated with Mel) loves the movie like most of the audience, Homer is much more critical. It’s Homer’s critique that gets through to Gibson, however, and the duo embark on a controversial edit of the film to amp up the action.

Review:

Wow! I’m actually impressed! I can tell from this episode alone that Season 11 is going to be haphazard. That takes a special kind of effort, writers, but you showed it! Good for you – enjoy my somewhat neurotic rant on this episode.

Yup, Season 11 starts off on a rather… less than satisfactory note with the aptly-titled “Beyond Blunderdome”. (They tried to make a punny, and they made a funny in ways they didn’t imagine.) So, what do we have here? Jerkass Homer? Homer getting a job? Zany schemes? Jerkass Homer getting a zany job? Well, you guess right if you got the latter, but there is one big issue with this episode that would damage it, even without the Mike Scully cliches.

It’s a love letter.

To Mel Gibson.

Scullyfied Simpsons: “The Old Man And The “C” Student” (Season 10, Episode 20)

Oh, dear! Now you’ve done it!

          “I want some taquitos!” – Jasper. No, not that one…

Airdate: April 25th, 1999

Written By: Julie Thacker

Plot: The IOC’s plan to give Springfield the 2000 Summer Olympics falls apart when Bart’s comedy routine offends the entire committee. As punishment, Skinner forces him to volunteer at the Retirement Castle. He finds the environment there overly restrictive to the elderly. Lisa, a frequent volunteer there, disagrees and argues that the environment there caters to their desires. Cue a One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest parody.

Meanwhile, Homer’s attempts at making a mascot – Springy – collapse with the Olympics bid. With an entire crate of springs to sell, he decides to embark on – guess what – a new career selling springs. It does not go well – particularly for Lenny’s eye.

Review:

Let’s be real here – the elderly aren’t treated well in The Simpsons. I mean, when this show was on all four cylinders, nobody was (“nuts and gum” was not a compliment), but man, oh, man, did the elderly get the shaft. Rather than wise and learned elders, they tended to be crotchety, senile (“I SAID FRENCH FRIES!”), dumped into decrepit retirement homes where they decline in more depressing ways than ever before… even the most successful senior in the show is not only a ruthless and heartless businessman (for now, at least), but hysterically behind the times in some areas. (“I’d like to send this letter to the Prussian consulate in Siam by aeromail. Am I too late for the 4:30 autogyro?”) It’s all about waiting out the clock until they die, which knowing The Simpsons, is a long, long, long time.

Since I compared the last Simpsons episode I reviewed to a Season 2 episode, may as well do the same here – this time with one of my favorites, “Old Money”. There, the Retirement Castle is dilapidated, everybody wants to take the elderly’s money, their families them on token trips while ignoring their interests, etc. Should somebody ever accuse The Simpsons of being weaksauce, I will throw on episodes like “Old Money” – which manages to fuse brutal social satire with a rather sweet ending – to inform them that this show once had guts.

Speaking of which, “The Old Man and the “C” Student”.